Wednesday, August 27, 2008


Just really feel like screaming fuck. Not really mad, angry or upset. I don't feel haste towards anyone. There is no pressure or anxiety that is "too much to deal with". Life is pretty good. Perhaps it's more of an exclamation. The excitement surrounding the word lights areas in my mind. Reactions are a fun part of it. It's not a widely accepted thing to do. There's the vocal release, the mental release, and the resulting mental release from screaming. I probably could. Doubtful anyone would really mind at 12:14am in NYC. Merely thinking about it sends shivers down my spine. It's only a word. Who invented curses anyway? Curses used to belong to witches, now everyone apparently has them. What's worse, screaming "fuck" out the window or screaming "shoot"? What if someone thinks there is a shooting? They could then be equally bad. I might just do it, and engage that little man that wants to be bad in my head. But what if someone thought that I got shot, or were seriously worried about my well-being? I am really only doing this for me. Other people do matter.


Monday, August 25, 2008

Trying it all

We live, on average, 75 years. At best, 100. Right now, in the best case scenario, I am 1/4 done with my life. Probably closer to 1/3. What now? This question has been at the root of my "search" since I graduated from college in the spring of 2007.

So, with 2/3 left, what to aim for, what to pursue, and what to ultimately make of my life and leave as my legacy? This question is easily answered when kept in the philosophical realm: the goal is to help people, to make life better for yourself, your family, build connections with others, enjoy the great moments, experience happiness, and to share your personal experiences in order to better the human race in some way before you die.

Great, got that down. Now, how does one make this happen? This is what life is all about. There is no one answer. There is no one perfect thing/things that people can do in order to live perfectly good and fulfilled lives. Now, there are a number of general guidelines that people can use in order to treat others with respect that can help them live better, but our actions are uniquely ours, and thus we have the choice to make literally any impact that we want to have.

For years, I wanted to be a rockstar, but not sincerely. It was more of a "geez, that'd be awesome to do lots of drugs, have sex with tons of women/men, travel the world, drive cars into pools, and never answer to anyone" type of dream. For a lot of people, this is "living the dream".

As of late, I have explored what "living the dream" means. For most people, post college life involves getting a job, building a resume, finding a mate, having kids, raising them, spoiling grandchildren, and then sailing off into the sunset. Not a half bad life. Just not for everyone.

Living the dream means pursuing things that others either wouldn't, couldn't, or would choose not to do. The type of things that are usually included in the dream are heavily art-based: Singing, writing, painting, playing sports, and other such things are typically what people consider "living the dream". However, when one actually lives the dream, and goes after one of these life paths, a few things happen.

One, the craft this person practices has to be in the top 2% of their field, otherwise no one will pay attention, and thus they will not be able to live. (either that or have a famous older sister, read: Ashley Simpson)

Two, this person often times needs to isolate himself from mainstream society, take a step back if you will, in order to describe the human condition in their craft from an objective viewpoint. This process can be difficult, especially when sincere bonds have been formed with those who have decided on a more traditional route. When advice is then given to the artist, it comes from those who have gone a different way, and therefore is mostly irrelevant to the artist's life. This leads to the person taking on an entire new life filled with more supportive people who have the same aims and life goals as the artist.

Three, if a person decides to go down the path of the dream, the more extreme and intense their expressions are, tend to be congruous with how successful that person is in the field.

So, either the person goes extreme, loses his friends, and becomes an artistic genius, or they banished by society as "insane". (Yes, there may be some middle ground) Either way, it's a damn tough road. know what they say, "If it were easy, everyone would do it". I chose this road a long time ago, (then again, is it really a choice?(this is a whole nother blog)) because I believe that I will be able to make the greatest difference possible by creating beautiful things to fill this world with.

I'd encourage you to try the same.

Much love,

Tuesday, August 19, 2008


So I've been in the city for close to a week now, and I've noticed a few things:
One-Everything and everyone move faster than in the midwest.
Two-No one cares who you are unless you are really really famous.
Three-There is nearly unlimited opportunity in the city for anyone who wants to work hard.
Four-I don't know, I really don't like this list to be honest, but you know what, fuck off, I'm a New Yorker. What's the matter you?

Needless to say, you catch on quickly here.

I've been networking and have a number of interviews set up, and feel really good about what I have done since I've been here. Now here's the kicker. Two weeks ago, I tried out for an Israeli basketball team, and originally they called back and told me that I should not count on having a job in Israel. So...I moved on and got more serious about jobs in New York. Two days ago I get a call from the team saying that they want to place me with another team in Israel.

I am on a plane as soon as they have a contract. I was considering staying in the city, but have realized(thanks to some talking to), that I can come to the city anytime, and that basketball is now or never.

I am ready to become as good as a basketball player as I possibly can. It is going to be my life and work for years to come. One good thing about playing sports is that you can only work out for so long each day, which means I will have lots of time to work on other projects/do other things; like writing, judo, learning hebrew, playing guitar, etc...I will update my blog with the team's site for anyone who cares to keep up with my stats. To the 4 of you who read my blog, thank you and enjoy!

Haven't gone Philosophical in a while, I guess getting out and living will do that to you.

I'm sure the Holy land will provide me with plenty to think about.

May next blog be in Israel! (Sedar joke)

Much love,

Monday, August 4, 2008

Good Times

I leave Thursday for Rhode Island. My roommate from college is getting married, so I am flying into Boston first, spending the night in Harvard Square with friends, then going to the wedding. After the weekend, I am going to NYC and will be interviewing with a number of companies. I will also be awaiting word from the Haifa Heat about playing for them next year in Israel.

Very cool options. I realized that I usually over think everything, and that I've probably missed a descent amount of enjoyment in life because I have been distracted by thinking about what makes me happy, rather than just being happy.

I am really excited about this move, will update soon.